For the sixth tale of Flashmas the Wildwood gave to me …

Goose goes a Wand’ring

Photo of a Goose in a snow covered landscape, flapping its wings.

Goose had woken in a terrible mood and the discovery that the first snow of the winter had fallen on the Wildwood overnight did nothing to cheer her up since it seemed that most of it was covering her front door. How was she to keep the Village safe from intruders and miscreants if she couldn’t get out of the house? It took a full hour with much pushing, shoving, and then shovelling to clear a path to the edge of the Wood, by which time her mood had soured even further.

The sun was shining brightly and the Village looked particularly charming in the snow, decked out as it was with decorations for Yule. Not that Goose noticed. She stalked purposely down the High Street, head turning in every direction, determined to root out any and all mischief she could find and ensure the perpetrators were suitably chastised. 

HONK went Goose behind the man in the Butcher’s shop when he didn’t say thank you. He dropped his packet of sausages on the floor and Mrs Hamilton’s beagle, Bertie, got them wrapping and all, because she had dropped the dog’s lead at the commotion.

But Goose did not see for she had already gone in search of other crimes.

HONK went Goose at the lady coming out of the General Stores who wasn’t looking where she was going. She jumped backwards in fright, right onto old Mr Arkwright’s bunions and he had to spend the rest of the day with his feet in an Epsom salt bath to stop the throbbing. 

But Goose did not see for she had already gone in search of other crimes.

HONK went Goose at the little girl who was staring longingly through the toy shop window at the beautiful wooden rocking horse inside and leaving smeary marks on the glass with fingers and nose. She screamed and ran across the road to her mother causing the postman, who was passing on his bike, to swerve into the display in front of the grocer’s shop and send potatoes and tomatoes and brussels sprouts cascading in every direction.

But Goose did not see for she had already gone in search of other crimes.

HONK went Goose in the Church when the organist, who was practicing for the Carol Service, played a wrong note. The poor man fell off his seat in shock and the ensuing cacophony (as his feet hit all the peddles at once) sent Father Langben reeling down the stairs to the vestry, caused him to badly sprain his ankle.

But Goose did not see for she had already gone in search of other crimes.

HONK went Goose at the people queuing for the Post Office when she considered they were taking up too much of the pavement. Crash went the stack of parcels Miss Babs from the antiques shop had been carrying, shattering a really quite expensive vase.

But Goose did not see for she had already gone in search of other crimes.

At Doves Tea Shop she was just about to open her beak and HONK at a small boy who hadn’t put his napkin on properly when she was grabbed and whisked upstairs into Eleanor and Sarah’s private parlour where the Witch was waiting. In the hour and a half that followed the three women helped Goose recover her temper, drink a fair quantity of Sarah’s best valerian, sage, and lemon balm infusion, and find quite a large helping of remorse into the bargain.

Suffice to say Goose spent the rest of Yuletide making amends to the villagers for her own crimes and swore never to take her bad mood out on them again. 


This story is the sixth of a twelve part series that was written at the start of December 2022 in response to daily prompt emails from Writer’s HQ for their 12 Days of Flashmas challenge. It is presented here pretty much just as it was originally written on the sixth day of the challenge. If you’d like to know more my explanatory post can be found here.


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